I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
