Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize