It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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