Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
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