also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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