Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize
