Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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