Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
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