He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize