grandma shit on top of the toilet
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize