do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just threw up on my dentist
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
