worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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