Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
