I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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