i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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