We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize