Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
