We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize