i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
