this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
