apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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