I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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