Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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