Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
