Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Mom said you looked used
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
