Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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