You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I have fence marks all over my body
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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