why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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