would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize