i just google imaged poop.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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