I don't usually arrange sex via text message
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
tell your sister to shave her snatch
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
