i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize