today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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