It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
