I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
