i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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