your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize