dude i'm inner monologue high
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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