okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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