Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
