I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize