I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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