Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Randomize
