I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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