idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
