I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
