He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
