Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
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How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
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I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
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