Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
