I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize