Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...

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(440): View more from Ohio

maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up

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(716): View more from New York

Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.

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These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Read it at the TFLN blog
(314): View more from Missouri

I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.

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(585): View more from New York

Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right

(631): View more from New York

Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15

(585): View more from New York

hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos

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(831): View more from California

She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"

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(301): View more from Maryland

Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.

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(701): View more from North Dakota

"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"

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